Chances

I thought about it again, should I care how much I win with it
Never once did it help me get me through it
But I try and try again, who ever thought I'd be alive to rewrite with such pain within these prison walls that I live in
Was it my fault, I guess it was, but it wasn't, so step off your pedestal
I could do much more for this world with this pad 'n pencil, then you could ever do with a pistol
Now listen, I care for you but you won't hear me through, I try to break you, but the words
that I say don't faze you
But I look to God for an answer, but underground it's muffled, to the day that I die I'll be baffled
To the people that care, I'll be there, whether or not I'll play it fair
Count the hairs on my head times blood shed hearts broken that I tried to prepare to repair
Now I need a moment to stare, the stars are showing my despair, bright ain't it
For everyone to see, I'm fading from this disease, I need a moment to pray

I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Gaze up to the heavens, yeah and show my strength
Stars count in billions, oh the chances that I have to gain in worth
I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Chances... I need chances, I got 'em
I need chances, yeah, I got 'em

So if you didn't listen, I'll repeat it again
You can't mark me, you're a sinner, I'm a sinner we'll do it again
But hey, why do we repeat what brought us here
I don't know, but it's easier to run than face our fear
Fear of losing you over my spinning head, I just can't get ahead
Back and forth I whirl to and fro all over the world
So as I get this on paper, I hope you understand
I ain't trying to hurt ya, it's just the way I am
Operate so upset, yeah in days I haven't ate, I'll separate, myself from you
I don't understand why, but that's what I do, just can't get through to you
I love you

I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Gaze up to the heavens, yeah and show my strength
Stars count in billions, oh the chances that I have to gain in worth
I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Chances... I need chances, I got 'em
I need chances, yeah, I got 'em

Are your ears open now, open up I've fallen and I'm down
Here I am the man who claims to wear the crown, all the answers, what a clown
I understand that now, please forgive me, my emotions keep me bound
Maybe I'll stay underground, yeah that'll make 'em proud
No, I can't now, give up and I'll never know how pure your love, white as snow
I love you I hope you know, I pick myself up now

I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Gaze up to the heavens, yeah and show my strength
Stars count in billions, oh the chances that I have to gain in worth
I just need, yeah a moment to myself
Chances... I need chances, I got 'em
I need chances, yeah, I got 'em
I got 'em now